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Drunk Buffoon Tries to Buy Girl Scout Cookies With Vodka

Jerry Swanson
Ardmore Police Department

People will go to great lengths to get Girl Scout cookies. They’ll also go to great depths. Like, say, the bottom of a bottle.

Police in Ardmore, Okla. arrested 45-year-old Jerry Swanson for trying to buy Girl Scout cookies with vodka at a mall last weekend.

Authorities say Swanson was so hammered at the time that he wasn’t even aware what he was doing. “He didn’t have anything to say about it, he didn’t even know what they were talking about,” the captain said. “He was unsteady on his feet and basically had to place him in the police car and barely able to walk.”

Hmm, perhaps this is why he was so interested in purchasing a box of Thin Mint Mojitos, huh?

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