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Man Makes Federal Case Out of Hospital Neglecting His Erection


There is no question about it, in a man’s world there a very few things as important to him as his wiener.  It is the one organ that we voluntarily use, abuse, and misuse on a daily basis. It is our best friend. We like to take it out when we go drinking or bare knuckle boxing, and occasionally we even like to take it for a swim.

The mere thought of succumbing to anything like impotence, amputation, or even painful erections is enough to send the majority of us screaming into the night. So it comes as no surprise that a Connecticut man and his botched boner are making a federal case against the Yale-New Haven Hospital for ignoring his “disabling erection” to watch a baseball game.

According to Daren Scott, he was forced to wait for over an hour with a painful erection after arriving at the Yale-New Haven emergency room three years ago. In his federal suit, Scott claims that “Notwithstanding his call for help, the staff, including the physicians, continued to watch the baseball game and ignore his condition.”

The man’s condition is known as priapism, which causes a persistent painful erection unrelated to sexual activity. Left untreated this condition can cause permanent damage. Of course, we don’t have to tell you that isn’t good!

Scott is not only suing the hospital for $2 million in damages, but just in case he loses, it is said that he has started a Kickstarter account in a brash attempt to raise enough money for a bionic wiener.

After all, a $2 million dollar man is only as valuable as his erection.


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