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Sad Mother Knits New Son Because She’s Craaaaaazy

Knitted Son
Club Geluk

Move over, Beverly Goldberg. You’re no longer the world’s most domineering mother.

Marieke Voorsluijs, of the Netherlands, was so sad that her oldest son was getting older and losing interest in hanging out that she did what any completely sane woman in that situation would do: she knitted a replica of him and then took photos of the “boy,” which she posted online for the world to see.

My knitted son skateboarding #knitstagram #knitting #knittingontheedge #scarycuddlyknit

A photo posted by Marieke Voorsluijs (@mariekevoorsluijs_clubgeluk) on

My knitted son hanging out #knitting #knittingontheedge #knitstagram

A photo posted by Marieke Voorsluijs (@mariekevoorsluijs_clubgeluk) on

Yeah. totally not creepy whatsoever. Not in some “knitted son comes to life to kill everyone in sight in an 80s-straight-to-video” movie way at all.

Kids growing up, becoming teenagers and wanting to spend as little time with their moms as possible is as routine as kids texting at the dinner table, but Voorsluijs, who has a business where — surprise! — she knits strange items — had a reaction that is hardly routine.

We say she should be ready to take some needling because she sure seems like a complete knit-job. And when she is teased, her son had better be ready for her to make him feel guilty. Because that, unlike creating fabric doppelgangers, is what mothers do.

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