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Seriously: This Dancing Toothbrush Demon Man is Terrifying, Right?

Am I the only person who finds this to be extremely menacing? Just me? Cool. 

Let me explain.

As a kid, I had a lot of irrational fears: the “if you’d like to make a call…” wrong number recording lady, actually just using the phone in general, and especially bagpipes. At an Irish festival, my mother turned around to ask me if I liked the music as the parade went by, and realized I had vanished. She found me hiding under a table with my hands over my ears. Yes, thanks for asking I was a very happy little kid!

In order to pacify my fears, my mother would often bribe me; it worked really well. That’s how I got the Mickey Mouse electric toothbrush, which ruined my life and my dental hygiene forever. It really helped for a while, because it was too fun to be afraid of…In the beginning.

Mickey Mouse Electric Toothbrush
eBay

Our of the box, the charging base was a bright, molded plastic Mickey Mouse statue, standing at attention, and holding a wrench for some reason. In retrospect, that is HORRIFIC, but for some reason it didn’t bother me then. Maybe I didn’t know what a wrench was. When you took the toothbrush off of the charger, Mickey sang: “Brush, brush brush your teeth…” to the tune of ‘Row Your Boat’ for however long the recommended toothbrushing time is. 42 seconds? 7 minutes? Still don’t know.

Anyway, if there was one thing we were not good at in my house, it was upkeep. Eventually, the Mickey toothbrush broke. Well, no; it half-broke. Instead of the cheerful, sing-song voice of Mickey suggesting that it might be fun to polish my pearlies, my new bathroom soundtrack sounded more like a creepy, sinister periodontal demon, demanding the blood of my gums. I had to use it for a year, because we still had all of the replacement heads, and “what was my mother, made of money?” She wasn’t; I asked.

Hope you enjoyed the fun video! (I’ll be 30 in May, and I still walk around the house while I brush my teeth, instead of standing in the bathroom.)

maeby meme

Less Terrifying: Snowman Gunfire

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