Why You Should Buy a Motorcycle This Spring
Life feeling a little stale these days? Winter got you down? Maybe you’re asking yourself, should I buy a motorcycle? The answer is yes.
Seriously, wasn’t that kind of like watching porn? I said kind of.
Tomorrow morning I am getting on a bus to Boston to attend a biker party on a big farm. I have possibly never been so excited in my entire life.
My entire family owns motorcycles and looks a lot like the cast of ‘Sons of Anarchy,’ I’m not exactly from aristocratic stock, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Even though I’m a girl or whatever, I’ve been in love with motorcycles since I was old enough to hold onto the back of someone’s leather jacket as we sped down the highway. For two glorious years, 2-wheeled vehicles were my main source of transportation, to the point where I sold my reliable, 1-year-old Toyota because it was just sitting in front of my house. I traded it in for a 1961 Ford Falcon, which also spent a lot of time sitting in front of my house, but it didn’t have a car payment.
Despite winter, rain, or pretty much anything, I rode almost everywhere I went. Why? Here are five reasons why owning a motorcycle will make your life better, instantly:
Nothing in the world is more fun. Besides sex, obviously.
Cool factor aside (and the cool factor is pretty awesome, I won’t lie, especially when you’re a babe) the feeling of riding down a big open road in the sun with the wind giving you goosebumps and blowing white noise in your ears is the best. Motorcycles turn a morning commute into a joyride — when I am in a bad mood, I take the long way. Just try to be pissed off while pulling off tight turns.
Excuse to Buy Cool Gear
Under the guise of “safety,” owning a motorcycle allows you to rationalize buying leather jackets, boots, gloves, cool helmets, and lots of other awesome junk. This is my next helmet — Evil Knievel style.
Built in Alone Time/Get-Out-Of-Terrible-Stuff-Free Card
If you tend to be kind of a lone wolf, motorcycles help you not look like a jerk when everyone is traveling somewhere together, and all you want is an hour to clear your head and be by yourself. Also, if you don’t own a car, no one can ask you to be the DD or help them move (which, as we all know, is the worst friend fate of all time). Caveat: Everyone will want to ride on the back, and some people are really terrible at it, so get a really uncomfortable/old and disgusting looking seat, to make it less appealing.
Everyone Wants to Date/Sleep With You
Seriously, have you ever seen the dudes on ‘Sons of Anarchy?’ With the exception of Jax, they are all pretty grizzled looking, and yet they have porn starts falling all over them — this part of the show is not dramatized. Motorcycles = sexy; I don’t even know why exactly. It’s probably part style, part badass, part freedom. Let’s not attempt to over-analyze a good thing, okay?
Motorcycles Save You a Ton of Money
Until my new bike gets here this spring, the subway is my only mode of transportation, so I currently have no idea how much it costs to fill up a car, but I know it ain’t cheap. A mid-sized motorcycle will cut your transportation costs by at least 50%, and I’m being conservative; my 150cc 2stroke Stella could hit 80mph on straightaways, and got around 75mpg.