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Survey About When You Can Fart in Front of Your Partner Doesn’t Smell Right

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This is the most important question you will ever be asked.

How long should you be dating someone before it’s okay to pass gas? That’s what the website Mic asked 129 people in their 20s and 30s. This is a big test of the chemistry between people who be on the course to spending their lives together (and is very different than breaking wind in front of people who have no choice to keep you in their lives or in front of your pets, who will love you no matter what).

Don’t turn your (offended) noses up at the findings:

  • 29% say between 2-6 months of dating
  • 25% say between 6-12 months
  • 22% say after a few weeks
  • 10% say they’ll fart whenever they feel the need
  • 9% say after a year

A YEAR?! Better hope none of those dates are for Mexican food, amiright?

As for when in a relationship you should be all clear letting ‘er rip without fear of the other person running away and checking back with Tinder:

  • 33% say when you begin having regular sleepovers
  • 19% say once you hear the other person fart
  • 8.5% say whenever they need to
  • 7% say they’ll never fart in front of his/her partner
  • 7% say after they’ve both said, “I love you”
  • 5% say after they’ve begun having sex

We gotta say we’d love to meet these renegades who claim they’re gonna fart whenever they feel the urge. Either they’re way too confident or are destined to spend their lives in a studio apartment, which is a shame because it’s so small there’s nowhere for your gas to go once you’ve cut the cheese.

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