We're not going to "sugar"-coat this: this is something to behold.

Competitive eater Matt Stonie helped himself to a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts, polishing them off in a ridiculous, amazing and clearly not good-for-your-digestive tract 34 seconds.

Stonie said the old record was 45 seconds and he managed to obliterate that in much the same way he destroyed his cholesterol.

The fact he did this in 34 seconds is remarkable, especially since it takes us 34 seconds just to open a box and figure out exactly which donut we want to eat. We guess when you're not discriminating it's much easier to eat with a speed you don't usually see without a fast forward button involved.

Eating mass quantities of sugared foods is no biggie for Stonie, who, back in March, gobbled up 200 Peeps.

More From GuySpeed