When Guys Shop at American Apparel – Hot Mess of the Day

Name: Three-Time Fashion Offender

Occupation: Greeting Card Writer

Interests: Speed walking (I call it casual jogging), one-stop shopping stores, Chinese culture (I notice some of them like to wear socks with sandals. Didn't know you could do that), onesies (the whole concept of it intrigues me).

Hobbies: Finding the perfect-sized wallet that fits everything I need and nothing more or less, taxidermy, competitive interpretive dancing.

What are you doing with your life?: Trying to get back in shape for the summer. Swimsuit season is already upon us.

Five things you can't live without: Fanny packs, spandex, unisex clothing options, inhaler, jogging goggles (though I'm no jogger).

What's the first thing people notice about you?: You'll know the answer to that when I turn around.

HEY, GUYS! This is not a real profile. It was made up for the sheer entertainment that comes from browsing through pictures of, well, hot messes. And Ladies! If you or someone you know should be one of our Hot Messes of the Day, send us a quick email.