Manti Te’o: 10 Shocking Facts He Also Wants People to Believe
By now, you’ve probably heard the bizarre tale about how Manti Te’o’s late girlfriend was made up. A sham. Completely unreal. Kind of like Notre Dame’s chances in the national championship game against Alabama.
Sadly, this is just the tip of the iceberg. Te’o’s lies are stacked up on each other like the silver dollar special at IHOP. Here are 10 other things about him you may be shocked to find out.
1. His real name is actually Irving Silverstein.
2. Mr. Drummond from ‘Diff’rent Strokes’ didn’t die. Te’o just made it up.
3. He thought he was playing for the Notre Dame Fighting Lie-rish.
4. He now has a new girlfriend he met over Twitter. He’s pretty sure she exists.
5. He made up the whole story because, come on, it’s embarrassing to be a Heisman finalist and not have a girlfriend.
6. After a long, heartfelt talk with Megan Fox, he also believes leprechauns are real.
7. He’s a Mormon and has just signed a deal to star in the new reality show ‘Imaginary Sister Wives.’
8. He claims he’s seen Bigfoot. And the Loch Ness Monster. And Lindsay Lohan sober.
9. Lance Armstrong paid him 50 bucks to get his name off the front page.
10. He promised that his imaginary best friend since childhood, Mr. Pickles, will come forward to testify under oath that he would never, ever make up such a ridiculous story.