Kathy Landin

Watch out, guys. The ladies have a new – and very valid – excuse for avoiding the bedroom time you’ve spent an entire evening working toward. This time it’s not a faux headache or "monthly visitor" story, it’s a real, and potentially serious, allergy.

New research shows that if you want to reach optimal happiness, you need to strive for having the "ideal day." Ok, this seems super obvious, but what isn’t obvious -- or in practice very much in our culture -- is what the “ideal day” really is. You'll like the answer.

This is it. The terrible day we all love to hate is upon us. You have probably struggled to figure out what to get your special Valentine, but do you think she has been struggling to figure out what to get for you? Are you tired of getting gifts that are more for her than they are for you?

You may be a video game geek, but after an announcement by New York’s Museum of Modern Art, you are also now a highbrow art enthusiast. This could make living in your mom’s basement the new “having a penthouse on the Upper East Side.” That’s because MoMA has acquired and plans to install a permanent exhibit of – you guessed it – video games.

The law is a funny thing. Many states have outdated laws on their books that involve antiquated social issues like women holding hands with men in public and where you’re allowed to tie up your horse downtown. Those are funny, but what’s better is when you find a law that has a really good loophole left wide open in it. You have to be clever and you have to know how to argue it, but it can be done

Wrestling is a brutal sport. Even if you’re in a more – we’ll call it choreographed - league, the moves are physical, require skill and can be rather punishing. And, if you don’t do them right you could kill yourself. If you mess up a move, and you’re lucky, you only land on your head instead of breaking your neck. Like this guy.

Most of us make it to adulthood knowing what foods are considered aphrodisiacs that could be helpful in improving our chances for a little desert if you know what we mean. You don't, we mean sex. Strawberries, chocolate, oysters – all of them have a reputation for helping you have a reputation. But, while they might help you get the engines started, these aren’t the foods that will help you cross

Got a date with that new chick from HR? Been trying to get your yoga instructor to grab a drink with you for weeks? Need to impress your GF’s parents when you go home with her for the first time in a few weeks? AskMen’s got your back. They’ve taken votes and compiled a list of 49 of the “top” men in the world. All you have to do is act like those guys.

Numbers and charts are usually boring things reserved for sales meetings and discussions about market influence and other corporate blah blah blah. But, today? Today the numbers and charts show that here in America, we are blessed with the cheapest beer on the planet. Cue the patriotic background music.

If you haven’t yet read the novel that launched a thousand vibrators, and if you prefer your books with the pages already stuck together, here’s your chance. Three industrious housewives are selling their thrice used copy of ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ on eBay.

We’ve all dreamed of doing it. That final “in-your-face” speech to the boss as we walk out the door of a thankless job. The verbal middle finger we spend those late nights and working holidays composing but never get to utter out loud.

The next holiday you spend with your family where you find yourself frustrated at how dysfunctional they all seem, please take a deep breath and imagine what it must be like to find out that you spent decades married to your own father without even knowing it. Then maybe have another drink.

Never has there been such great motivation for keeping your ride clean, especially if your lifestyle is dirty. Police in Malaysia have arrested several people involved in a loyalty program that offered free sex to patrons who paid for ten car washes.

Nothing spices up a marriage like a good bedtime threesome and nothing spices up a good bedtime threesome like gunfire, a standoff and the SWAT team. Hopefully when these people get out of jail, they’ll start making videos.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand that being a telemarketer isn’t the best job ever. Often you are interrupting people at bad times, offering them things they don’t want, encouraged to be pushy and then get hung up on pretty much all the time. This comes with the job. Which means, you shouldn’t threaten to bomb their homes when it happens. Unless they've changed how it's done. Read

It’s ok to have really great sex in your own home, but be careful, because if it’s so great that your neighbors can hear it, you might get arrested. Especially if you live in South Australia where more than two-thirds of the people polled online said police were right to arrest one rather vocal couple for just that.

The couple who robs together, stays together. Clearly that’s the hope of Sean Foxx of San Antonio, TX who managed to earn two balls and chains in one crime spree. The very romantic boyfriend of Treila Woods asked her to marry him after they were both arrested for aggravated robbery.

It stands to reason that a man named Jackmeoff Mudd would be up to no good. You saddle a guy with that kind of name and you almost guarantee that at some point, he’s going to get himself into some trouble. That’s exactly what happened in Ft. Lauderdale, FL recently.

It may not be good form to use the actual word, but the term for it is now officially a part of the English language. The word czars at Merriam-Webster have added the “F-bomb” to the dictionary.

A tattoo can be the perfect artistic expression of something you feel very strongly about. Tattoos are no longer just for sailors, soldiers and inmates. A lot of people have them and a lot of people like to show them off. They have settled in the main stream. But are they for buttholes?